Friday, September 11, 2015

10 New Leaked Plot Points of Star Wars The Force Awakens!


Jacen's cousin Fabio sent his little birdy our way to let us know of a few plot points of the upcoming Star Wars film, The Force Awakens! After the jump see what they are, oh and beware SPOILERS!


  • Captain Phasma will never remove her helmet on screen. The only clues that she may be a woman are her feminine voice and hips-don't-lie stance.
  • General Hux will indeed bite the dust in this film. No, seriously, he will faceplant in the desert on Jakku. No word on if he dies or not.
  • Kylo Ren is the masked cyborg seen in leaked concept art from back in October 2014. After a duel with Luke he will become disfigured and talk to his favorite Sith Lord's melted helmet.
  • There will be a flashback to the duel on Cloud City from The Empire Strikes Back as seen through the eyes of Lobot. He is the one who found the MacGuffin saber and kept it safe until Kylo Ren kills him on Jakku. Finn gets his hands on it at that point.
  • Rey is not related to Han, Leia, Luke, Lando, Ackbar, Nien, Jar Jar, Nute, Panaka, Sheev, or Mace, but Finn is related to Captain Typo. He 's his grandson, or nephew or something. Oh, and he's also Jacen's cousin.
  • Poe Dameron will make out with a slutty Twi'lek chick in a new cantina scene in Maz's pub. No word if he takes her to bed or not.
  • Leia will make a joke to Han about him missing out on seeing her in the bikini she wore in Return of the Jedi. Apparently they never hooked up, therefore no kids together. Sorry, breeder fans.
  • Nien Nunb will confirm that Lando died shortly after the Battle of Jakku, crash landing the Millennium Falcon on the planet's surface.
  • Andy Serkis motion captures every single character in the film. Everyone else is there for moral support.
  • Luke remains a virgin.

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